My Own Ref Sheet!

I got my first and only ref sheet and I’m so, so, so incredibly happy to have Noegenhed ( be the mastermind behind this absolutely wonderful art.

The idea for this was prompted by a lovely patron of mine who worked tirelessly with me and Noegenhed to make sure things went smoothly and to offer input and advice along the way. Honestly, I never considered getting a reference sheet. I just thought, you know, that I write smut. I don’t really have fursonas or anything like that. However, the idea was brought up and, after talking it out, I was sold.

This isn’t for a character of mine. This is for me.

The feminized version is a part of myself and has been for years and years, expressed through writing and thoughts and views that have evolved over the years.

There’s a ribbon there – a small detail I came up with a night or two after the initial rough of the ref sheet was created. It’s an important detail and you’ll notice how messy it is – how loosely tied and simple it is.

At times, I envy the styles I see in women’s clothing – the accessories, the cuteness and variety of outfits and just how it all fits together. As well as, again sometimes, wishing that was me. But, it’s not.

The ribbon is a manifestation of that. That desire of allowing myself to be cute – to accept that I’m allowed to be more than I am at times.

I wrote the ribbon detail as the character shyly spotting it in the store and buying it on a whim. There, at home, away from the views of others and in a femme werewolf form, he would pull his tail over his leg and tie it simply, crossing the ribbon back and forth to let it fall loosely at the end. It’s uncomplicated and basic because he doesn’t know how to do any more than that. And yet, he feels his heart ache as he stares at it with a small, tremulous smile on his lips. It’s a small step towards allowing himself the luxury of feeling cute despite worrying what others may see or think.

For the character himself, the three nights of a full moon trigger a transformation into a werewolf. It’s a kind of bestial drunkeness. Still human in thought but struggling with all of the urges, desires, instincts, and so forth that the werewolf form brings on. The transformation can also be brought on by force of will or, sometimes, during extreme emotional responses. The feminized change is similar – sometimes a full moon will bring out that werewolf form. Sometimes emotions can bring the change to a feminized human form. Both can be achieved through effort and they bring their own influences.

He still doesn’t quite trust himself to do more than wear the ribbon, but he’s working on it.

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